I can't help but let my love of art and architecture influence the company logo and illustrations you see throughout this blog.
There's something about visual storytelling that resonates with how I approach coaching - both require an eye for balance, proportion, and the subtle elements that make everything come together beautifully.
Because You’re Ready to Step Into Your Full Self
Looking back on my own corporate career, I learned the hard way that talent alone isn’t enough. We navigate new languages, unspoken rules, and second-guessing that can keep us from our full potential. I’m no exception. I know I would have been even more successful, more confident, clear, and empathetic, if I’d had a coach: someone to challenge my thinking, help me cut through mental clutter, and stand with me in the big moments. Now I draw on my hard-won wisdom and a stubborn curiosity to help others turn ambition into action.
If you’re ready to step into your full self, let’s talk!
Finding Our Inner Anchor: Steps to Regain an Internal Locus of Control
Have you ever felt like life is just happening to you, as if you’re constantly reacting rather than choosing actions? At the heart of this experience is a concept called the Locus of Control, the degree to which we believe we have control over the outcomes in our life. When it’s external drivers that dominate, we feel like circumstances and/or people dictate our path. When it’s internal, we believe that dedicated actions shape our life.
So, how do we shift back to an internal locus of control and start feeling more empowered? Here are a few practical steps to help you reclaim that sense of agency:
- Pause and reflect: Notice instances or focus areas where you feel stuck or powerless in your life. Awareness is always the first step.
- Change your language: Replace “I have to” with “I choose to.” This subtle shift reminds you that you have a conscious choice, even when it doesn’t feel like it.
- Set small, manageable goals: Focusing on what you can control in the short-term builds momentum and confidence, regardless of the magnitude of each goal.
- Focus on next steps instead of blame: Ask yourself, “What can I do next?” rather than dwelling on what went wrong. Forward momentum is key.
- Surround yourself with supportive people: Gravitate towards individuals that lift you up and encourage you to take ownership of your life.
You don’t need to control every detail — you just need to focus on what’s within your reach today.
At the core of this shift is the question: What is important now, right now? When you focus on what matters most in the here and now, you create space for clarity and intentional action. That clarity fuels confidence, and confidence builds agency.
Each choice you make in this moment, however small, is a vote for the life you want to create. By aligning your next step with what’s important right now, you gradually shift the balance from feeling reactive to becoming deliberate, grounded, and purposeful.
The Thought We Never Finish
Most of us believe that our thoughts are neatly formed somewhere inside our minds - complete and coherent. Yet, as the behavioral scientist Nick Chater argues in The Mind is Flat, that’s an illusion. Left to the privacy of our own heads, these thoughts often stay half-formed as fragments looping without resolution, jumping from one idea to another, giving us the feeling of thinking deeply while we’re really circling the same terrain.
That’s where coaching comes in. The coach’s role is to create a space where thoughts can be spoken aloud, examined, challenged, and clarified. When thinking becomes articulated, it transforms into insight; clarity evolves into intention. From there, commitment gives rise to action, and change becomes tangible. In this way, coaching isn’t about telling people what to do — it’s about helping them finish thinking, so they can begin doing with clarity and confidence.
What Happens When Vulnerability Crosses from Genuine to Performative?
I grew up in a culture that valued restraint and composure, where emotions were meant to be mastered, not displayed. “Comport yourself,” was the inner voice that guided much of my career.
We understand now that vulnerability can build trust, connection, and psychological safety. But without discernment, it can backfire.
My clients - managers of people and teams - often come to me puzzled by what they see as the overuse of vulnerability in the workplace; at times, this display feels naïve or even performative.
Beware: when overused, vulnerability can erode trust and create emotional fatigue rather than connection. True vulnerability is quiet and discerning, expressed through self-awareness, not display.
And that’s where coaching comes in: within the protected, confidential space of a coaching session, openness and self-reflection truly serve you. They become the foundation for growth, clarity, and self-discovery.
The Universe Isn't Revolving Around You (And That's Actually Good News)
I caught myself doing it again yesterday - wondering if everyone noticed I stumbled over this concept on slide 4. My mind is constantly making me the star of a drama that likely existed nowhere but in my head.
Here's the thing: our brains generate a staggering number of thoughts about ourselves every day. We naturally place ourselves at the center of our own universe, interpreting everything through the lens of "what does this mean for me?" Philosophers like David Foster Wallace describe it as the human “default setting”: assuming we are the center of every story. We're constantly making assumptions, filling in gaps with stories that usually cast us as either the victim or the villain.
But here's the liberating truth: most of the time, it's not about us. The friend who didn't respond to your text? They could be swamped with deadlines.
The antidote to self-reference is curiosity over assumption. Instead of asking "what did I do wrong?" try "I wonder what's going on for them?"
The world is vast, complex, and beautifully indifferent to our inner monologue.
And that's exactly the freedom you've been looking for!
How to Build Lasting Confidence
We tend to believe confidence is something you either had or didn't - a fixed trait that lucky people were born with while the rest of us fumble through life second-guessing every decision (see my next blog post on The Voice That Sabotages Our Success).
This is one of the most common challenges my clients bring to our sessions. Here is what I share with my clients: confidence isn't a personality trait, it's a skill! The vicious cycle of negative story-telling and paralyzed action can only be broken by feeling the fear and acting anyway! But how do we actually overcome that fear? Consider this: fear and excitement are neighboring emotions, both are high-arousal states that feel remarkably similar in your body.
During our coaching sessions, we explore how fear can be reframed into excitement through awareness and intentional mindset shifts.
What could you create and who could you become, if fear had no power over your choices?
If you're ready to develop these confidence-building techniques and break free from the patterns that keep you stuck, I'd love to explore how we can work together in a coaching session.
That's where your most authentic, powerful self emerges.
The Voice That Sabotages Your Success: Taming Your Inner Critic
I used to wonder why my mind consistently looped back to repetitive, negative thoughts, such as "am I really ready for this?" or "what if II failed?" The more I interacted with the coachees, the more I discovered something liberating, … we all have this core, negative voice.
All I work with - executives, entrepreneurs, creatives - battle their inner critic daily. The most successful people aren't those who never experience self-doubt - they're the ones who've learned to recognize their inner critic and refuse to let it create fear or drive their decisions.
Your inner critic isn't your enemy; it's a misguided protector trying to keep you safe from failure and rejection. When I catch myself spiraling into self-criticism, I pause and ask: "Would I speak to my best friend this way?" This simple question has become my anchor. I advise you to start treating yourself with the same compassion you'd offer someone you deeply care about.
What if you could transform that inner critic into your most trusted inner coach? What could you accomplish if that critical voice had no undue power over you?
That's where your real life begins.
A Lesson from 30,000 Feet
Last week, I found myself trapped in sensory chaos while flying. Screens everywhere - seatback entertainment, overhead videos blaring, passenger devices glowing, a broad collection of adult conversations, and periodic trumpet solos from small children. All these stimuli created a visual assault that left me overwhelmed. The moment I slipped on my eye mask and inserted my ear plugs, everything changed. Without the visual and auditory chaos, I could finally breathe deeply and find my center again.
This simple act reminded me of one of the most powerful principles in habit formation: environmental design. Just as I needed to eliminate visual and auditory distractions to find peace on that flight, our success in building healthier habits often depends less on willpower and more on thoughtfully crafting our surroundings. As an example, when we can't focus during deep work, should we redesign our workspace to bring in natural light, air, and more comfortable furniture?
Your habits are only as strong as the environment that supports them. Stop fighting against your surroundings and start re-arranging or designing them to work better for you. What's one small environmental shift you could make today that would make your desired habit feel inevitable rather than impossible?
Stay tuned for more thoughts from behind the coaching curtain!